To Do List

Sitting on the balcony of my second floor apartment building, I drag my cigarette and listen to the footsteps of people walking by on the sidewalk beneath me.

Tat, tat, tat. Tat, tat, tat.

It sounds like it’s two people but I don’t care enough to look and see for sure. I just listen to the tat-tat-tatting until I can’t hear it anymore. Then it gets quiet for a second. A second more.

And then a car alarm starts wailing in the parking lot.

WHEEE-UR, WHEEE-UR, WHEER-UR! It goes on for a while. WHEEE-UR and WHEEE-UR and WHEER-UR’ing.

I finish my cig and smush the butt of it into the sole of my shoe. Makes it smell like stale smoke and burnt rubber. Then I remember that I brought a beer out with me and I find it on the ground next to my feet. I pick it up and take a pull. It’s already kind of warm but I keep pulling on it anyway. Fuck it.

WHEEE-UR, WHEEE-UR, WHEER-UR!

Tat, tat, tat. Tat, tat, tat.

I think about going inside but I’m not sure what I would go in there for. I came out here because I was bored in there. Only now I’m bored out here, too. Bored everywhere. Or I’m just having a hard time doing nothing. I’ve always had a hard time with that. Always felt like there was something that had to be done, even though I know that I could do nothing forever and it wouldn’t make a damn difference.

I take another sip from my drink and I take my bowl out of my pocket. It gets quiet again, and this time it lasts for more than a few seconds. Maybe a few minutes. And that’s ok. It’s all ok. There’s nothing that I have to do.


DEAD RED FISH – debut novel now on Amazon

24 responses to “To Do List”

  1. Oh, having nothing to do. Love that feeling. Haven’t felt it in a while. This brought back memories. Great post.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. feels nice. thank you

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Dead red fish… interesting 🙂 I’m def going to read it as soon as I can 🙂
    few minutes of quiet and nothing is a paradise for the big cities :))

    Liked by 2 people

    1. basically haha. and enjoy the book. let me know what you think

      Liked by 1 person

  3. god, don’t I know it!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. nice to know you feel it too. nice to know it’s not just me

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You’re definitely not alone. Even when it feels like it sometimes.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. sometimes it does. but thank you

        Liked by 1 person

  4. Sounds interesting.
    Congrats.
    (typo-DeaS)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. thank you

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Interesting observation of reality Lou!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I’ll say it again, Lou…Hunter S. Thompson.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. thats a big compliment. thank you

      Liked by 1 person

      1. It is true as well. You are welcome.

        Liked by 1 person

  7. thanks Ben

    Like

  8. Life gets tedious- don’t it!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. shit yeah it does

      Liked by 1 person

  9. Meanwhile, your car is gone….

    Liked by 1 person

    1. hahah, shit

      Like

  10. “even though I know that I could do nothing forever and it wouldn’t make a damn difference.” You got that right homie. Most of what we do is to alleviate boredom…it doesn’t make a damn difference, but we do it anyway.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. pretty much. kinda sad, but true

      Liked by 1 person

  11. Boredom or meditation? I git those two mixed up sometimes…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. guess they’re kind of the same

      Liked by 1 person

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