Music

I want to write words that move
like a bass line smoothes out
a slow song.
I want this thing
to beat your bones
like it was a fucking kick drum.
Like buh-dum
dum
dum.
Can you feel it bumping yet?
Like a song that you loved
but forgot about
until just now.
These words are fucking music,
but they only make sounds
in your head.
Can you hear it?

Published by lou rasmus

Lou Rasmus is an independent author from Chicago, IL. His works are largely focused on exploring the meaning of life – or lack thereof – while the themes of love, relationships, and self-loathing are also central to many of his stories. His upcoming novel, Primrose Isle, will be his third self-published title. Grapefruit Juice, a collection of bitter poems and short stories, and DEAD RED FISH, his semi-autobiographical debut novel about a young man coming to age on a road trip with his childhood friends, are also available on Amazon.

41 thoughts on “Music

    1. Music, unless recorded, is more forgiving. Drop a performance clam and it’s gone, take your beating from the band and move on. Or call it Jazz. Typos and poor phrases printed are a shame forever…

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Difference of opinion is a wonderful thing. Showing one’s sophomoric (half) ass product and excusing it as draft, anywhere in public, is inexcusable. Save for avant garde local or collegiate theater, and then it’s sort of an expectation. Hit me with your best shot, you know? Or save your ammunition.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Comments like yours get under my skin and motivate me to write more…not necessarily better…but more. So keep commenting. The fact that you’re directing your energy in my direction is a positive thing. Thanks. (Chances are I’ll never post the 2nd/3rd draft to WP anyway. This is a sophomoric venue that I use as my learning tool. Comments from readers, like yourself…only help move the story forward. So thanks for the energy…seriously.

        Like

  1. I hear you Lou
    But you’ve gotta do
    The baselines from your head
    It has to be neat
    But not a repeat
    Of something that you’ve read
    Don’t worry of the grammar
    Don’t worry of the tense
    Disengage your ego
    Forget the audience
    Make sure it’s authentic
    Make sure that it’s true
    Make sure that you feel it
    MAKE SURE IT IS YOU.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Uh…This would be a song about desire to write a song? I’ve played synthesizer, for real, since 1973. I’ve stepped inside my mind and heard shit that’s acid on crack reversed and immersed in a 3D orb and seen music fly out of a piano harp as colorful geometry. So my question is are we reading the desire to write like that feels? The trick to the kick is 60 cycles or down where you can count them, gated, with some smack on the attack and the fading luminosity ooooooommmm. Here’s one. Did you know that churches long ago used the 32 foot or longer oragn pipes to rattle the room and instill fear in parishoners? That a standing subharmonic can cause your bowels to let go and stop your heart? If you desire to write like that? Strong enough to stop people’s hearts and make them shit where they stand? That, my man, is a kick ass desire and may you succeed! No more candy ass.

    Liked by 1 person

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